It’s OK to Scream Like a Girl When a Horse Is Standing on Your Toe

by Kevin on January 31, 2011

I was walking the big sorrel colt out of the arena. He had done his best to buck me off the entire time I rode him. When we walked out of the gate, my biggest test was yet to come.

I had just gone through the gate and turned around to shut it. Like most broncs, he failed to come through and just stood there blocking the gate from closing.  I tried to lead him through with one hand, but I had to walk off a couple of feet to get him out of the way.

He only needed to take one more step and he would be clear of the gate. I smooched to him and encouraged him to go one step further. It was in this last step that the huge sorrel stepped right on my foot. To be more concise, he stepped right on my left big toe.

This horse was huge! This turned out advantageous when he was tryin’ to buck me off. He was big, but he was also slow and a little uncoordinated. Now that all his weight seemed to be compressing my toe into the thickness of a quarter, I no longer found his size as something I could use against him.

Since I was already next to his left shoulder when he stepped on me, I slapped him on the butt to get him off of me. Although he did move, he demonstrated a very accurate pirouette on his left front foot and ground my toe even further into “toe-burger”.

I tried to kick him the belly with my right foot, but he was out of reach. I tried to shoo him back by throwing my arms up in the air, but he just lifted his head up out of reach of my flailing arms. The act of raising his head seemed to intensify the weight that was crushing me.

I think it was the high pitched girl scream that finally scared him off my foot. I hit the ground and pulled my foot up into my lap and rocked it like I was trying to sooth a weaned puppy. I had let go of the reins and he conveniently found his way back to the pens at a dead run. I would later collect the remnants of these reins when I hobbled down to unsaddle him. He had the nerve to look at me with a look of, “Where have you been?”

I wanted to cuss. I wanted to beat him to death with a soft bar of soap. I dreamed of getting the shoein’ anvil and droppin’ it on his head. His hide would look so good on my living room floor. But, I never hit him or cussed him.

I wanted to. I needed to. I longed to, but I just wanted to get finished and get to the house before someone saw me hobbling around with tears in my eyes. I’m sure the blood curdlin’ girly scream had alerted the Stockton Volunteer Fire Department.

When I pulled my boot off, the blood poured out of it like a pitcher of kool-aid. My sock looked to have been used to squash grapes for wine and my toe looked like one of those grapes.

Despite all the temptations to scream and cuss and kill, I was able to swallow them down and be a man about it. Sometimes we think that if we don’t release our pent up hurts, accusations, and feeling, we will just explode, but we won’t. We must remember that Jesus himself went through all sorts of stomps and beatings and never lost his cool.

Since he himself has been there and done that, he is able to help us when we are being tested and stomped. Hebrews 2:18 (SCVSimplified Cowboy Version)

It’s gonna be real tough, but the next time you want to scream and cuss and punch something, just remember that you can get through it without losing your cool. You might lose a toe in the process, but there’s nothing I can do about that.

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  • Becky B.

    Love this post. I especially enjoyed Heb 2:18 SCV. It made me smile.

    • Kevin

      Thanks Becky!! If you’re on Facebook, check out the Simplified Cowboy Version fanpage for daily scriptures.

  • Ed

    I like the SCV!

    • Kevin

      Thanks Ed. Because of your comment, I used it for today’s SCV verse on my facebook fanpage.

  • Don Coyote

    Ya know, sometimes I surprise my ownself anymore…why just the other day, my girl was LOOKIN’ for a fight with her mama, and through the grace a God I turned it around to the point I actually had her agreein’ with me. Didn’t even hafta break out the quirt, strap on the spurs nor break out a 2 by 4 like I woulda done in the old days, let alone raise my voice…God is sure good to children ‘n mules.

  • Heather :) :) :)

    Oh, loved Hebrews 2:18 in the SCV 🙂 🙂 🙂 Greetings from Oregon, Heather 🙂

  • lori jones

    Laughed so hard I had tears rolling down my cheeks. It made Paul ask what I was reading. Thanks for using your pain and great sense of humor to get the word of God across! The folks in Colorado are in for a true blessing. Our family will be praying for yours! Much love.

    • Kevin

      Thanks Lori! I know that God is doin’ mighty works through you and Paul. Keep it up and I’m proud to ride on the same crew as y’all.

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