Psalm 73 (Simplified Cowboy Version)

by Kevin on July 1, 2010

A psalm by the cowboy Asaph

1God sure does cotton to Israel, especially to cowboys

with a pure heart.

2But I almost fell and busted my butt,

3cause it put a burr under my saddle

to see all those proud outlaws brag and flaunt their prosperity.

4They ain’t shiverin’ in the cold or sweatin’ in the sun, they stay healthy,

5and they ain’t got no troubles to speak of

like us hard workin’ cowboys do.

6Their pride is like a silk neckerchief,

and they dress themselves in meaness.

7They are like fat, lazy barn cats that

have everything their hearts could wish for!

8They scoff and make fun of people and speak only of evil;

in their pride they search the brush and hills for someone to trample.

9They boast and brag against the Almighty himself,

and their words strut around like a banny rooster.

10And so decent folk start ponderin’ and gettin’ all confused,

and start drinkin’ in their words like men dyin’ of thirst.

11″How can God know?” they ask.

“Does He even know what’s takin’ place down here?”

12Just take a gander at all the outlaws–

they enjoy a life of easiness and their money breeds faster than rabbits.

13Did I always do what was right for nothin’?

Was there a reason for livin’ life on the straight and narrow?

14I ain’t got nothin’ but trouble from the time I wake up until the sunset fades;

every morning I have a new pain to keep company with the old ones.

15If I had really talked this way to the other cowboys,

I would’ve been a back stabber to your people.

16So I pondered on the question of why outlaws and no-accounts always seem to prosper.

But that’s as tryin’ and taxin’ as diggin’ post holes in solid rock.

17Then I saddled up and rode into the green pastures of God,

and I finally understood the destiny of these wicked idiots.

18You sure ’nuff put them in the slick rock country

and send them slidin’ off into destruction canyon.

19In the blink of an eye they are destroyed,

completely swept away by terrors.

20When you arise, O Lord,

you are gonna laugh at their silly notions

like a person giggles about dreams in the morning.

21Then I realized that my heart was bitter and caustic,

and I was all tore up inside.

22I had been an ignorant fool–

I must have seemed dumb as a sheep to you.

23Yet you still ride beside me;

you hold the reins to my life.

24You guide me by whisperin’ in my ear to do what is right,

all the while leadin’ me to that ranch in the sky.

25Is there anyone in heaven for me but You?

I don’t want to prowl the pastures of this old rock with anyone else.

26I might get sick, and my soul may grow weak,

but God is still the strength and power of my heart;

He’s my pardner for all time.

27Those who shun Him and shuck out for the hills will perish,

for you destroy those that run out on you.

28But as for this cowboy, I’m glad to pull my mount up beside the Almighty!

I have made the Lord my marshal,

and I will tell everyone about the wonderful things you do.

Simplified Cowboy Version (SCV)©

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  • Nicely done! The translation into cowboy holds together very well. You’ve made the Psalm clear in plain cowboy talk to anyone who listens.
    I sure enjoyed this, Kevin.
    Have a Happy 4th of July,

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