The microwaveble prayer

by Kevin on June 29, 2010

I remember the very first microwave we ever got. There wasn’t fancy buttons for popcorn or defrosting. There was just an on and off switch hooked to a simple stove top style timer. When you turned the timer on, you got full power. When the timer dinged, the microwave went off and it was done.

I recently had to enlighten my 14 year old sister to the pitfalls of our father and microwaving. In the thirty years we have been using microwave ovens, he still thinks everything needs to be cooked for at least 5 to 10 minutes. When 30-40 seconds will get the job done, he will smash out toaster oven times.

I know people who view prayer the same way. They think in order to have an active and effective prayer life, they have to be able to pray for a long time. They think that a good prayer must contain a kajillion words and last at least 10 minutes.

You are not the only one that has prayed a prayer similiar to this:

Dear Lord, I just want to thank you for everything you have done for a man such as me. I ain’t real good at praying, but I do want to get to know you better. Thank you for giving me such a wonderful family and I know that the soldiers overseas need your protection. I also know that you know that I forgot to buy dog food when I was at the feed store. The price of feed just keeps going up and up and I better call that guy that wants to look at the horse trailer I got for sale. I wonder if he will go for $3000 or if that will just run him off. Speakin’ of runnin’ off, I might not feed that dog ever again if he keeps going and gettin’ in Mrs. Johnson’s flower bed. She’s gonna feed him some buck shot if he don’t listen.

Oh, sorry about that God. I just want to ask forgiveness for the terrible thoughts I had about my boss the past couple of decades. But man that guy can be a world class jerk. Speaking of jerk, I thought that big steer was going to jerk my horse down right on my left leg. I need to start feeding them steers less or put my horse on P90X………Amen.

If we can’t learn how to pray effectively for about 30 seconds, you probably won’t be able to stay on track for 1 hour. So in order to help out, I have come up with a simple plan to get all ya’ll cowboys and cowgirls started with effective prayer. Try it sometime. Just five simple steps that are one sentence each.

  1. Tell God who he is and what he means to you personally.
  2. Tell him about something you’ve been struggling with.
  3. Ask him to help someone specific and others in general.
  4. Ask him to do something for you.
  5. Remind him of a promise he made to you that shows you have been reading the Good Book.

Your simple prayer would go something like this:

  1. Dear Lord, I know that you died on the cross to save a sinner such as me.
  2. You see, I have this problem with looking at things on the internet that I shouldn’t and I need your forgiveness.
  3. Old Bobby sure needs a big helping of your Grace while he deals with that illness he is goin’ through.
  4. I’d like you to help me come to know you better and put my priorities where they should be.
  5. I’m gonna saddle up now and ride with you because you said that you are the only way to have peace, joy, and eternal life. Amen.

 

“When you talk to the Boss, don’t run your mouth off like an auctioneer that don’t know when to say ‘Sold!’ Just repeatin’ the same words over and over and over again don’t get your prayers answered.” — Matthew 6:7 Simplified Cowboy Version

Try to get rid of the canned prayers that you have heard all your life that don’t really come from your heart. Instead, just keep it simple and know that God is listening.

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  • Sweet metaphor there. I’ve been trying to explain that to the youth I mentor for about 10 months now. Def going to use this. Thanks!

    • Kevin

      I bet when you put your twist on this post and present it, it will be way cool and probably better. Let me know how that goes.

  • So clear and concise! Wish I had thought of it when I was writing on prayer. I still have one more aspect of that to cover.
    Really enjoyed this post and probably will forward it to friends.

    Blessings,
    Janis

    • Kevin

      That is one of the greatest compliments I can get–forwarding it on. Glad you enjoyed it.

  • I love it when you ask someone to pray over the food and 20 minutes later when my mashed potatoes are cold they say Amen!

    Consistency is definitely more important than time spent when it comes to prayer. It’s like talking with my wife. If I talk to her for two hours on Sunday and then don’t speak to her again until Saturday, we (I mean me) are going to have problems. However, if we have shorter regular conversations each day then mama is much happier, thus everyone is much happier.

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  • I agree that the problem with most of my prayers is not the length, but the focus. What you give here is helpful in giving an outline for our prayers. It is similar to the outline I often use from the Lord’s prayer:
    1. Begin by focusing on my relationship with God, “Our Father in heaven”
    2. Praise and thank God for who He is and what He has done, “Hallowed be thy name.”
    3. Pray through priorities, “Thy kingdom come, thy will be done”
    4. Ask God for my needs and the needs of others, “Give us this day our daily bread.”
    5. Confess sin and recieve forgiveness, “Forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors.”
    6. Pray for God’s protection in spiritual battle, “Lead us not into temptation but deliver us from evil.”
    7. End in thanks and praise again, “For thine is the kingdom and the power and the glory forever.”

  • How did I mess this one? I do like short to the point prayers. I don’t think anybody likes a sermon during prayer time. Get to the meat of the matter! thanks, Brother.

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